Sunday, 26 October 2008

WTF to the max

Has my luck improved? Has it fuck!

Check this out. This is one of the funniest hands I've ever played:

PokerStars Game #21500138892: Tournament #116481725, $10+$1 Hold'em No Limit - Level II (15/30) - 2008/10/26 0:54:10 ET
Table '116481725 1' 9-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 2: Bridget1968 (3435 in chips)
Seat 3: DD2280 (1080 in chips)
Seat 4: FR Vessant (3400 in chips)
Seat 5: Pro97 (1680 in chips)
Seat 6: PROJECT.KO (735 in chips)
Seat 7: achiever (3170 in chips)
achiever: posts small blind 15
Bridget1968: posts big blind 30
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to FR Vessant [Qc Ac]
DD2280: folds
FR Vessant: raises 60 to 90

Standard raise with this strong hand.

Pro97: folds
PROJECT.KO: calls 90

Absolutely terrible player. Called my valuebet with KT on an AA885 board with 54. No prizes in this game for three pair, bro.

achiever: folds
Bridget1968: calls 60

Even worse player. Has been involved in nearly every hand, making on the whole terrible decisions.

*** FLOP *** [4c Ah 5c]
Bridget1968: checks
FR Vessant: bets 210
PROJECT.KO: calls 210
Bridget1968: calls 210

WTF. Well, Bridget is seriously bad, and can have any ace here, and just about any draw. The other guy must have an ace imo. But if he does, he has to shove!

Either one could have a flush draw, and that would be good for me because obviously I'm drawing to the nuts.

*** TURN *** [4c Ah 5c] [7h]
Bridget1968: checks
FR Vessant: bets 480

I think I have to bet here. I'd prefer to be up against one player, but shorty isn't likely to win here.

PROJECT.KO: calls 435 and is all-in

Calling with his ace, I figure.

Bridget1968: raises 2655 to 3135 and is all-in

WTF? Well, she can have A7, I suppose, but she's played badly enough to put AJ/AT in her range. If she has me beat, I have odds to draw out. I'm not delighted to call, but I don't think I can fold here.

FR Vessant: calls 2620 and is all-in
Uncalled bet (35) returned to Bridget1968

*** RIVER *** [4c Ah 5c 7h] [As]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Bridget1968: shows [3s 6c] (a straight, Three to Seven)

What. The. Fuck. The poker gods are just teasing me now.

FR Vessant: shows [Qc Ac] (three of a kind, Aces)
Bridget1968 collected 5330 from side pot
PROJECT.KO: shows [7d Ad] (a full house, Aces full of Sevens)

So both these fucking clowns drew out on me on the turn!

I know, this is how we make money. Except I'm not. I'm losing it. Because this is happening to me every fucking tourney I play. I have cashed one in the last nine. Yesterday, I desperation shoved J8 into JJ, pushed AK into AA, and stacked off with AT on a T high board, get this, against TT. And those are just the hands I didn't get fucked over by the god of luck, but was only booted in the nuts by the god of cold decks.


Anonymous said...

boots sez:

Not to worry. You're a bright lad, you'll figure it out.

Dr Zen said...

Well, at the moment I'm thinking you've cursed me, boots, so if you wouldn't mind rearranging the universe so that it works out a bit better for me, that would be cool.

Arleen said...

Well, at least now you know the luck (or lack thereof) is a matter of person and not place. ;-)

I hope you're having fun otherwise.

Anonymous said...

boots sez:

Zen, if I've cursed you (obscenity aside of course you cunt) it's only because I'm an absolute fuckwit in the Sorcerrer's Apprentice department and the fucking mop has gone off on its own.

You must decide how things work my friend. Either they work mechanically according to the maths or they work some other way. If they work mechanically according to the maths you know the drill about grinding through the bad places. If they work some other way you'll need to figure out how that is.

And you can't possibly figure out how that other way is while you remain convinced that there is no God (not that 'God' is a uselful word since it's been fucked to death by "big beardy" and his hangers-on) or at least a guiding cosmic order to the universe.

Really all I can do to help is to point out that if it's mechanical and working according to the maths you're doing a piss-poor job of working it as would a machine.

If I could hand it to you on a paper plate, I would do that in an instant.

Dr Zen said...

Well, I think I do an okay job of working the machine. It's the universe that isn't doing its bit.

Anonymous said...

boots sez:

"Well, I think I do an okay job of working the machine. It's the universe that isn't doing its bit."

Zen, I love you as a brother because of your steadfast backarsewardness.